"A gun is an inanimate object much like a spoon. Either one can kill in the wrong hands." -Marc

You are a gun owner and this is what you "believe", do we have that right?

Hey, let's play with your gun is like a spoon idea.

I leave spoons out in the open around the house all the time. Fuck...I can do the same thing with my guns then too!

I let children play with spoons all the time. They have complete access to a spoon whenever they want. Guns are like spoons so fuck it...give 'em a gun too.

School cafeteria has spoons available...why not guns too? What if a student wants to shoot a pigeon for lunch instead of having pizza...give 'em a fucking gun for Christ’s sake. Letting the poor kids that don't have lunch money shoot, kill, and prepare their own lunch is only being fair to them.

Besides if every student was fucking armed fucking crazy bastards would think twice about going to a school to shoot it the fuck up. Gun training should be part of every kindergarten curriculum I say.

When you get on a plane they give you a spoon for your coffee and apple crumble so why not allow fucking guns on the plane too!

Every fucking time I go to a restaurant they give me a goddamn spoon to use...why the fuck don't they give me a gun too...I mean what if somebody attempts to rob the place while I'm there? Fuck if we were all armed we could all start shooting at the prick!

Hey, I can solve this abortion bullshit too...we'll make all abortions legal but we'll make it mandatory that the only abortion that can be performed is by gunshot! That's right, bitch wants an abortion you get your gun and shoot her in the belly. That'll fucking teach them won't it! Plus, that will cut the cost of abortion down too cuz, you know, anybody with a gun can perform one and it only involves the cost of a bullet...which you can buy cheap at Walmart right! And shit, for a good shot like you I bet you could take the head of that fetus clean off with just one squeeze of the trigger.

I get the feeling you might be pulling back from me a bit here, Marc, but you know we can cite some statistics that show spoons and rocks kill more people each year than guns do...or at least the same amount...in the right hands...don't they?

You want to know what I think, Marc?

I think that you should have to have a full psychological profile done on you before you are allowed to purchase or own a gun.

I think it should involve a multiple choice test and a meeting with a psychiatrist to evaluate you.

I think a question like:

"A gun is like a spoon." True or False

Would be a question that should be on the test and if you answer true to a question like that...you don't qualify to own a gun.

I think if you already own a gun you should be tested annually including a meeting with a psychiatrist to evaluate you once a year (all on the gun owner's dime of course) or you lose your right to have a gun...and again if you answer that a gun is like a spoon...you lose your guns...period.

I think you should pay a steep tax per gun you own.

I think there should be an obscene insurance premium per gun (just like you pay for your car only a lot higher). Maybe $3000-$4000 per gun per year and higher premiums for weapons with larger capacities. If you can't keep up with the insurance you can't keep your guns. Fucking insurance companies would love this! Plus they get to raise the premiums every time there is a shooting like ones we get to enjoy news coverage of so often.

I think every gun owner just like every car owner should have to "re-register" their guns each year at a steep fee determined by our fucked up politicians.

I think if you are a gun owner it should be recorded on your drivers license and passport so when you go through airport security they know to pull you aside and give you the extra fondle...in fact they should have a special line that takes a fuck of a lot longer for gun owners to go through where they have a good view of the express line for the people that don't own guns breezing through only having to remove their belts and shoes...cuz a belt or shoes can kill in the right hands...right?

All these taxes, fees, testing, doctors appointments, and insurance premiums on the more than 100 MILLION guns (we can't produce an accurate fucking number at this point so it may be far more than that!) in private hands would of course be a massive stimulus to the economy!

So, I agree, I support gun ownership! Own as many as you want if you can afford it and any kind you want too. Buy a bazooka if you want so when you go hunting bambi doesn't run off wounded and suffer...you fucking kill and cook her with one fucking shot...but be prepared to pay the super high insurance premiums and all the rest of the fees to prevent bambi from suffering.

Enjoy your guns...oh wait...if you think a gun is like a spoon then I'm hoping they take yours away.

Of course when somebody goes to a school or movie theater or any public place really, and kills a bunch of people with a spoon...well...then I would subject all of us spoon owners to the same standards I recommend for gun owners...and of course, then I'd give you your guns back because then you'd have a case for spoons and guns being a lot alike.

Until that day comes, I think you, and I just mean you personally "Mr. Aspoonislikeagun" should have your guns taken away.

Everybody else that understands the difference between spoons and guns and can pass the psychological test, pay the fees and insurance I propose be instituted...as soon as possible...they can keep their guns.

I think this will be great for the economy!