Mick, when I was a kid in the 1970s I played youth football, our kind not that footsie thing you guys have, Pop Warner Football was what they called it here. When we had practice or a game some parent would pick a bunch of us up in a station wagon, one of those ones that had fake wood running down the sides and the radio in the car would be on. It always seemed to be on in the 1970s. And this song, which was a big hit, would often come on...

...and when it did, we all sang along with it. Now, I don't know where the guys from America are, but now when people think of America's Greatest Hits...well...they don't think of this album anymore. Instead, they think of a lot of stupid and shitty things our country unleashed on the world. 

Now in this moment where the American people cast some votes that show we're not as bad as some people might think we are, we should at least celebrate a little. So, go get your Collings and learn this song so we can do a proper sing-a-long and maybe change the lyrics a bit...

This is for all the hairy Pagens

Thinking that shaving is too hard

Don't give up because of those bloody cuts 

A bit of tissue makes all that bleeding subside