Shorn in the USA

although but a hairy wank, he secretly wishes he were a hairless Yank

flush with his incomprehensible underdog victory in Mordor (also known as Iraq to some), he is now a wellspring of overconfidence, and goes around singing, 'c'mon baby, fight my Shire'.

while clipping his monumental toenails, he's been known to warble that ol' ditty, 'i've been working on the nail row, alllll the livelong day....'

and this just in: unsatisfied at constantly coming home filthy after working as a free-lance chimney sweep (he biked to work; didn't need a truck to keep any tools in - just impale him on a broom stick and start scrubbin'!), Mick has moved on. he is currently employed by Rogaine, serving as their model for the 'after' photo in their ads.