fuck that, i'm just another employee in the mail room. but that feeling for one's kids is the prevailing kamikaze.

i lifted this from my uber-ego-trip of a blog, so trip on this, Micky me boyo -

Holy Kapow! just 'by accident', i hit the 8:30 meeting, and it was a new (to me) format, a speaker discussing spiritual principles. i knew i was in the right place when he launched into a long, humorous, and utterly fascinating talk about The Great Obsession With Self. how the [constantly chattering] mind is conditioned to assess, interpret and assign value to experience, and we make the grave mistake of deeply attaching our identity to it to the point that we say, I think therefore I am, like, this self is in fact Me. wrong. what you are, he explained, is way beyond merely the self (or ego, if you like). the self is concerned only with self; painful experiences, pleasurable experiences, it doesn't care, as long as it's in the driver's seat. like a parasite that attaches itself to the host and convinces the host that it, the parasite, is the host. total reliance on something totally unreliable! and because it gets rendered null, it does everything in its power to prevent direct, expectationless experiencing/being in the Moment/merging with the Infinite.

a guy proudly goes out on his perfectly manicured lawn, barefoot...and steps in shit. turns around and steps in more. starts going out in big boots, with a pooper scooper...gets real adept with it, an expert Manager of Shit, because there's constantly shit everywhere, but...dude, LOOK FOR THE DOG.

Bill Hicks was (once again) correct: One consciousness experiencing Itself subjectively. the illusion that we are singular/different/separate from each other prevents the ability to empathize. you are still you, a sentient being, but you are not your 'self'. what you Are is, in fact, an individual expression of the endless essence or love or the all or whatever you feel like calling it. when you are fully in the moment, it's like a hose flooding a kind of holy water through you. it flushes away the gunk caused by the self, and some of the water remains, to purify and elevate and bring you closer to the All that is your birthright, and that's the real homecoming. Life stops happening TO you, and other people cease to be so responsible for the pain you may feel; it becomes simply Life just being Itself. you become free of anxiety, attachment, fear. Enlightenment.

books about 'learning to be in the moment' are unnecessary, because you can never not be in the Moment, and the search for spiritual truth is a misdirection play by self, because you ARE the spiritual truth. only by (the choice of) being fully present does the self fall away. like, get over yourself, and go with the Flow.

Funny Stuff: i had just been digging some Buddhist text an hour before, the chapter on...Over- identification With Self. ha!

the only real downside i can see to all this is that Mick is actually God.