Paul:

Okay, I'll play along . . .

First of all, as everyone here well knows, I feel a special affinity to a certain numerical sequence --- 741 --- thus, the name of my own hypothetical life soundtrack would have to be called THE 741 CHRONICLES.

THE 741 CHRONICLES by Kent Daniel Bentkowski

As I was born on Thanksgiving Day 1961 with a medical condition, the first song to make an appearance on this soundtrack is:

01) Somebody Get Me A Doctor! - Van Halen (1979)

Because of my affintiy for music which actually started at quite a young age, the next song to appear is:

02) . . . And The Cradle Will Rock!! - Van Halen (1980)

Of course, a character such as myself was rather uncooperative during my school years, the song that would correspond to this would be:

03) Problem Child - AC/DC (1976)

With my father experiencing five marriages between my birth and sixteenth birthday, the song that corresponds to this experience is:

04) Bye, Bye Love - The Cars (1978)

When I reached puberty, I became fascinated with my own --- well, you get the idea. The song that best corresponds to this time of my life is:

05) Beat It With Your Fist - Frank Zappa (1980)

My parents were such sleeping sheeple that I hit the road as soon as I could get out of there. The song that fits here is:

06) Blissful Ignorance - Sensible Shoes (1981)

My partying nights at local clubs were legendary in that for about five years, I went out seven nights a week. Of course, there are a couple of songs that remind me of those daze:

07) Ladies' Night In Buffalo? - David Lee Roth (1986)

08) Cocaine Decisions - Frank Zappa (1983)

08a) Cocaine - Eric Clapton (1976)

09) Reefer Head Woman - Aerosmith (1979)

When I think of those old friends that eventually ended up stiffing me for whatever reason, or people who sat and cried about losing their girlfriend, I think of these two songs:

10) Asshole - Tom Petty (1996)

11) Broken Hearts Are For Assholes - Frank Zappa (1977 & 1979)

When HIV and AIDS came into my life, these following songs seem to fit the best:

12) Tainted Love - Soft Cell (1981)

13) AIDS + Armageddon - David Baerwald (1992)

14) Faith - George Michael (1987)

15) Don't Give Up - Peter Gabriel (1986)

16) Beat The Reaper - Frank Zappa (1993)

When a lovely angel entered my life, giving me the strength to endure matters that would have forced others to quit, the following songs are the only appropriate choices:

17) Hey Paula - Paul and Paula (1957)

18) Diamonds and Pearls - Prince (1991)

When I had my Near Death Experience on May 5, 1980, the following song seemed most appropriate:

19) Dead Or Alive - Van Halen (1979)

Because of all the moving around I did through five marriages and four divorces as a young man, I am not especially fond of Christmas. It only makes me miss the true family that I lost through one of the divorces. The sadness of Christmas occurs to me during the following song:

20) Darkest Night Of The Year - Steve Lukather (1989)

When conspiracy first entered my life, this could have been the song on the soundtrack at that precise moment:

21) Does It Really Happen? - YES (1980)

And when I think of a future with a New World Order, I am defeated and depressed, as my life is under the control of the . . .

22) Central Scrutinizer - Frank Zappa (1979)

When my story comes to an end, these are the sounds that are playing while credits are rolling:

23) Give Peace A Chance - John Lennon (1970)

24) All You Need Is Love - The BEATLES (1967)

25) Imagine - John Lennon (1971)

There you have it --- the double CD edition of the soundtrack of THE 741 CHRONICLES.

On sale now at finer 'wrecka stows everywhere!

KDB = Buffalo, NY USA